Testimony of forgiveness and resilience of a policewoman, victim of armed conflict when she lost her first daughter in a guerrilla takeover in Magdalena. Iris was one of the people honored on Veteran's Day.

By Erick González G. 

Two dreams saved my life because God was giving me another chance ... the pain of the death of a son does not compare with the pain of anyone ... after 23 years of the death of my daughter Diana del Carmen in the guerrilla take that I suffered in Pueblo Nuevo, in Magdalena, I cannot see news where they talk about the guerrillas or movies where there are many deaths or a lot of action because memories return, nightmares ... I was a police officer when in that shot they also killed a nephew 16-year-old and a 14-year-old niece was shot six times, who survived.

Oh, yes, my name is Iris Teresa Rodríguez Villegas, and I am not sorry to say my age, I am 47 years old, I was born in Barranquilla, and only God knows why so many things have happened to me, because I am an only child and when I was born my Mom was left in a wheelchair… I had to sell fruit on the street, sell lottery to be a policeman… I swore the flag on August 21, 1993.

I always liked working in operatives ... what is working in operatives? An operative policeman works in the rural part, where you have to go out to patrol the sidewalks, on the farms with a rifle, with a grenade ... I liked that life as a warrior, I was not afraid of anything, I would get involved with the rifle without any fear to dead ... I remember that in an operation I saved the life of a superior who was shot and with the tip of a stick they took out his eye.

• Iris, Iris I'm going to die! Don't let me die, girl!
• My major, you are not going to die…!

I grabbed the major and dragged him out, and as I had first aid knowledge I helped him; with one hand I hold him where his eye was gouged out and with the other I undressed him ... I was with him until the helicopter arrived.

Who were they? The guerrillas… ah! In an operation in an invasion in Sincelejo, there was a guerrilla involved in that invasion.

I was also in a search block in the time of Pablo Escobar ... only communes ... I was patrolling for Kennedy, for Manrique, a group of 40 to 45 people, because they killed many policemen and civilians ... going up to Manrique they took us down ... our base was in El Poblado and one night we were crazy about going to dance at a disco called “As de Corazones”, in the heart of Medellín, when the administrator:

• You have to go now! They came to kill all of you!

And we went out through the windows, through the doors, there they killed our fellows ... that was terrible ... they were going to shoot us down ... they knew that this operative group existed ... hard times ... at that time we had to service the Atanasio Girardot stadium ... there were three trucks that went out, I went in the first, ahead with the driver, when they plumbed the second truck leaving the stadium… it was a very tough ambush… with a group of drunken comrades we went into the cemetery at night to say goodbye to our friends.

I was not afraid of anything until my daughter was killed… there I began to value life. I worked at  Plato - Magdalena, where there was a very abusive lieutenant ... everything I did for him was bad ... I talked about it to my sergeant, but he told me there was nothing I could do. If he knew that I was married? I was already the widow of the father of my murdered girl, who was also an agent, who was killed during the service in San Marcos, in Sucre.

So in Plato I was already a widow, but my daughter was living in Barranquilla ... that lieutenant exercised abuse of power and as he could not have anything with me, he transferred me to Pueblo Nuevo ... there the companions received me well and I made good friends, especially with a colleague named Arzuza, who would die in the shooting ... but the lieutenant was still watching me, he called to ask what I was doing ... once he called to tell me that I couldn't live outside the facilities ...

It was my Christmas break on December 24, but he told me that I couldn't, that for the 31st, but later he told me that it wasn't possible that day either. He granted me permission on January 7, so I went to Barranquilla that day ... I got home, and my daughter and my nephew told me to take them to town ... sometimes things warn, but you don't realize that … They had already told us not to get distracted that the guerrillas were in the towns, that we were pumped… the next day I took them to Pueblo Nuevo, where we had a wonderful time.

It was my turn, but I was not the watch commander ... what does that commander do? At that time, he was the one who had to verify the weapons, that the personnel were complete, that is, he was in charge of writing down the news that was presented in the six or eight-hour shift ... there was a desk and a table where they made the guard annotations. When I get comfortable at the desk I see a water outlet in front ...

• So strange, Arzuza, that sale of water there in front, when I was in Guarandá, in Sucre, there was a sale of water in front of the station and it was to do intelligence.
• We are coming to talk ... what is the guerrilla going to do or anything!

And I see a Caterpillar next to the station ...

• Ay, Arzuza, that Caterpillar is so rare, see that in Guarandá from a Caterpillar they gave lead to the station.
• Nothing is going to get into here.
• I don't like that sale of water.

I went to my room, where my little girl was with my nephew, because there was a party that night in town, and when I came in, my little girl told me: "Get down." I bent down, put a little hand on my shoulder and said: "Mommy, my daddy Omal came", he was already dead ... "No mommy, daddy Omar is in heaven," I said ... "No, mommy, my Daddy Omal came and said: 'Yiana, I love you very much.'

I did not understand the message ... I put her to bed and went to the front of the station with the rifle, but I did not take the grenades ... there were two guardhouses, I went to the right one with Arzuza ... on the left, companion Rincón became ... he never sat there, he always sat up front, in an abandoned house.

I went to the guarhouse where Rincón was and he joined Arzuza ... I started to play with the safety of my rifle ... I told him: "Turn off that light that the guerrillas are going to put in and the first one they are going to kill is you". Sometimes you speak and words have so much power ... when a truck comes slowly and I see that they began to fall like ants and they began to shootingd ... I don't move ... I thought it was a tactical case, I thought many things and did not think that it was the guerrilla.

I react, turn around and see Arzuza and Rincón without a head; They are the first to be killed because they had the light on ... I began to shout: "Not my daughter, not my daughter", and she yelled at me: "Mommy come, mommy come" ... and I started giving lead ... the wife The station commander was there on a visit, pregnant, and I shouted: "Don't shoot, don't shoot, there's a pregnant woman, let her out!", and she came out in front of me and I told her: "Take my girl, take me the girl! ", but the nerves did not give her to grab the girl ... I keep shooting ... they do not kill me because God did not want ... when the guerrilla said to my daughter:" Shut up, motherfucker! ", and boom ! He swallowed the shot in the head, and I shout: Nooo, my daughter, nooo! When he did that, I threw myself on the floor and killed him. I couldn't get to my daughter because they kept shooting ... I told a colleague to throw a supplier at me and he passed it on to me ... I kept shooting, but I ran out of ammunition ...

There was a pit there because we didn't have a toilet, and I got into the pit, I lay down there and a guerrilla managed to step on my leg, but he didn't realize it, because the pit is pure excrement with dirty water and mud, do you understand me? ... buried there I listened when they said: “Let's go, let's go! Time is over who knows where that bitch was”; They knew how many of us there were, they called us by name, they had given us intelligence.

When I felt that everything was quiet, I went out to a pool that we had, I washed and ran to where my daughter's body was, I grab her and with one hand I take her by the body and in the other hand her brains fell out because they blew off half a head , She looked at me with the other little eye, sighed and stayed in my arms ... the shot they gave to my daughter, that same shot killed my nephew, a niece was shot, but she pretended to be dead and they took her away for Hospital.

From so much medicine that I took I have forgotten faces, names, I don't even remember who was the partner who took the girl from my arms ...

I denied God and the Virgin of Carmen ...

I have my other children with my current husband, but one child never replaces another. I tried to kill myself before having my other daughter ... one day I came to my apartment, I sat on the sofa, I put the revolver to my head, to my mouth, to my chest, I cried so much that I fell asleep on that furniture ... when I saw myself in a big house with stairs in gold and an emerald in the middle, and when I put my first foot on the stairs, an old man dressed in white with a beard that reached to his feet called me, but instead of feet he had ribbons , and he called me: "Iris, you are looking for me", I turned around, and since I am so rebellious I asked him: "And who are you?" ... "I am God, and you still are not going to enter me home ", I said:" What are you going to be God, you are not any God ", and I mounted the other foot, but when I put the second foot, he told me again:" Iris, I already told you, you are not going to Enter my house, come back! ” When he told me that, I woke up, opened my eyes and had the revolver between my legs… that was the first opportunity God gave me.

The other, when my daughter María Angélica was eight years old, I had a dream in which I saw my daughter, the deceased, who was in heaven, she had no feet, she had white ribbons ... I told her: “Let's go, mommy, let's go to the church for your first communion ", and she replied:" No, mommy, you can't go to church, you have to take care of my brothers"... actually that happened when I was in labor with my second child, who now he is 17 years old, and at that time I was bleeding from a caesarean section ... I almost died, and from then I lost the desire to take my life, because if God wanted it that way, it is because he still needs me here ...

I am retired ... last Veteran's Day I had many mixed feelings, of joy, sadness, of remembering again, but I am very grateful that the Victims Unit has taken me into account for that commemoration, because one is not alone and the pain I am sharing with other people ...

My husband is still active in the Police, my daughter is 21 years old, studying the sixth semester of psychology and wants to specialize in forensic sciences, and my son did the first semester of Law, but he wants to enter at Escuela General Santander to be a Police officer ... my husband and I agree with that decision ... I have no resentment with the Police or with the guerrillas or with anyone ... I think that one has to forgive, and only God knows why things happened ... I hope that I Heal the wounds, but if you ask me, Iris, do you want to go back to the Police? I would not doubt it, I would dress up.